The S Word

 There is a reason you do not see Me using the word "supremacy" in My Femdom. As a white person I am not comfortable deploying that word because I know that it sends out a very specific signal to a particular audience (neo nazis). The word Femdom, on its own, does an outstanding job of inverting the power dynamic. Yes, I have dropped the s word on occasion, but it always felt like a very impractical and uncomfortable pair of boots that you suddenly realize are kind of distorting and damaging your legs and not in a hot way.

We have many other better ways to communicate Female power without using that word. I really don't want to have people searching white supremacy hashtags's and find Me because I branded Myself as a Female Supremacist. And I don't need to use that specifically loaded word to inspire desire or anything else in My subjects.

Let Me be clear: I do see value in WOC/POC using that word, should they choose. People of colour have been going along with white people's crap & excuses while being the better people long enough to own any term they want. Part of Me recognizing & taking responsibility for My privilege is acting as an amplifier for other voices, and part of that is Me saying, "I don't get to say what words POC or minorities get to use".

Look, the contemporary reality is that much (most) of Femdom is super misogynistic male fear driven FANTASY. It seems only a very few Dommes understand this FULLY. Those who do excercise and take control of/with their minds and do not budge on their boundaries. They do not do things for profit or publicity that hurt other Women, minorites and the vulnerable. They do things that OPEN doors for other Women and all Women. The most intelligent Women I know are all Dommes, and yet some are other things as well... doctors, judges, architects, teachers, engineers and world leaders.

In this culture we see men in positions of power seek out a submissive role sexually, but we often see Women who hold power seek out dominant roles sexually which I read as an internal recognition that being a Woman in power feels simultaneously more frustrating and more precarious than being a man in power. Why? Because it is easier for a man in power to set that power aside for a fantasy, confident they can pick it back up the second the session ends, than it is for a Woman who has every reason to believe the second She lets Her power go it will disappear.

On  first glance "supremacy" seems to be describing a position of power: that someone is powerful or has power at their command. Historically, however, the word "supremacy" relates less to whether one has power as it does to whether the power one has is intrinsic, inalienable, or justified. When classical authors wrote about the "supremacy of the state" they were not saying that governments are powerful but that power & government are so interconnected that it makes no sensne to talk of one without the other. (Cicero, Plato, Diogenes)

The problem with Female Supremacy is that it underlines the concept of supremacy as being that those who have power are those who SHOULD have power. (See Google guy manifesto). Supremacy says power is a right and not something that just happens, that power belongs where it is. To use the word is to give the ultimate signal of "don't move the status quo". Supremacy leaves NO room for either equality or equity. Equality is a fight for survival. Equity is a fight for justice.

Femdom without the supremacy is a fantasy but also a practice of the free exchange and redistribution of power by consent. More subversive than a man on his knees before a Woman triumphant is the idea that power is fluid, arbitrary but can be placed according to the desires of the people who interact with it. The concept of supremacy is so interwoven with our culture and understanding of power that it takes significant time and effort to recognize how radical an alternative, like consensual power distribution, genuinely is.

If we want to be authentic subversive or disruptive agents of change, we need to challenge assumptions about what power is more than question who has it.

+<3

Some Thoughts the DMCA

I really can't get behind issuing DMCAs or having them issued on My behalf because I am not okay with supporting or using a legal weapon that indiscriminate. I never have been, I never will be.

I have serious concerns with the lack of due process & the shoot first ask questions NEVER approach to DMCA enforcement. It's an enforcement that lends itself to a unilateral shoot from the hip/tactical nuke form of censorship. For example: The fact that in the music industry DMCAs are routinely used to protect top 40 artists who are blatantly ripping off lesser known ones is pretty evil. It's also pretty well documented but not in a way that is presented to us as ubiquitously as the work of the offenders.

This is an issue I have a lot to say about because I don't see the facts supporting the damage of piracy presented with as much proof as the arguments for how piracy actually supports artists. I am very interested by the arguments for and against piracy. The arguments for it are backed up with actual statistical data while the arguments against seem to be taken on blind faith alone. For example: Treating downloads as if they were sales that would have happened and then calculating damages accordingly involves a number of unsubstantiated leaps of logic.

If I were to make use of DMCAs I would be helping to set even more precedents for their widespread use and deployment. Why does this concern Me? Because this is also a tool too often used to silence opposition. (For Example: The British National Party has made wide use of DMCAs to silence critics). It's easy to look at the reactions of individuals sharing paid content and project guilt onto some of their comments about being shut down for doing so, but the reality is DMCAs affect an individual's ability to participate in the conversation. It's not like a Cease and Desist where due process can be reasonably expected and which includes the courtesy of a warning. Very few platforms or connection providers even investigate the legitimacy of a DMCA claim. The most common response is immediate account termination.

My opinion is this: The Digital Millennium Copyright Act does exactly what it was intended to do, which is save massive organizations like the IRAA or private media empires the headache of having to go through due process to achieve their often dubious aims. A process they can easily afford but which poses risk if they don't win outright. They don't want to lose even one inch of ground to progress. (I am reminded of a rant by Malcom McDowell's character from 'Water and Power' in Tank Girl...  "oh it's just one little tract of land"...)

That's My opinion & I am aware that few of My peers feel the same as I do about DMCAs. I absolutely understand the appeal of a one-call solution, and I can't help but compare it to the ease of acquiring a gun.

That's been My position and philosophy with regards to content distribution and also with the tech behind peer to peer sharing sites.

We constantly use technology developed for file sharing (by people who donated their time and expertise to build this tech without expectation of compensation) that came from some extremely shitty-to-visit or engage with parts of the net, and that is not easy to digest. Not easy at all.

That's a short overview of some of My thoughts on this subject. I've posted about this in the past and likely will again in the future. The circumstances that brought these issues to mind if anything illustrate some of the problems of the DMCA and some of the problems with our collective responses to it. 

I am in the position of being accused of issuing a number of DMCAs and take-down orders including one that resulted in an FTP account closure (which was hosting content that included but was not limited to Mine). I was not involved or even aware of this in any way and yet due to the way DMCAs are issued and responded to, this is not an easy thing for Me (or anyone accused) to prove. I can however point out that those persons claiming to have been contacted or threatened by Me claimed that said threats came from an email domain I know for a fact does not exist, as I have legal ownership of said domain and have no email server or service associated with it. My fans can verify that all My direct email contact is through a good old fashioned gmail.com address.

When I moved My content to a pay site I did NOT pursue any previously distributed copies, nor did I pursue anyone participating in unauthorized distribution of content that was never released free. I see little overlap between My new audience who is in the habit of buying content from clip sale sites and the audience who is primarily file sharing, and as such I do not see the latter in any way damaging the former. 

I see no contradiction in making a file available for purchase regardless of how it was available previously or other ways it may be available now. One thing that paying consumers are getting for their money is the ease and protection of accessing My content through their preferred platform. Another thing many are not aware of is the additional time and effort I put into remastering some of My early work to improve sound quality before uploading it to be purchased anew. 

I have been doing this long enough to have underwent many changes in how and where I host My files. Even though I charge for My content now, I know unequivocally that allowing unauthorized file sharing to continue does not harm Me in any way. I have roots, and this is not Me going back to them as much as it is Me demonstrating that My stance on file sharing has not changed. What has changed is how much less time I am willing to set aside for creating payment processing solutions only to have them disappear weeks or months later. 

My current platform dramatically simplifies the administration and accounting involved in content distribution. As My work has grown increasingly popular the gifts I receive have become challenging to manage. For example, at one point I had more than 300 pairs of shoes that had been purchased for Me by fans. Part of My move to a monetized platform is to ensure that expressions of gratitude and appreciation do not fill every inch of My living space with shoes, jewelry and fetish clothing. 

No, really. It was becoming a serious problem. I've recycled a rain forest worth of Amazon boxes. The post office was becoming My second home, and seriously: no one needs two cubic yards of frilly panties. 

My audience seems to really enjoy supporting My continued content creation by keeping Me in the studio top lists, loyally returning to collect My latest files, and even taking the time and effort to vote or like My sessions. As I see it, all of this is simply a natural progression and evidence of My success.

Love,

Ellechemy

Copyright Clarifications

From time to time I check in on this forum because I will receive an email from a fan with a link to posts they made promoting My work. But sometimes I receive messages of distress from fans who want Me to be aware of what is going on in this community in My absence.

I checked in today to find a whole lot of bullshit and misrepresentation:

- Forum members claiming to have received DMCA and take-down notices from Me.

- Others claiming I was directly responsible for cancellation of their file hosting accounts.

- A post made by someone impersonating Me issuing a blanket threat of legal action.

- Claims from forum members that I had emailed them (of course no screen caps of this) demanding tribute for downloaded content.

- A whole lot of confusion regarding the licensing of My previously free content.

- Rumors that I sold My brand and content to someone else. (patently absurd, countless fans can verify that I am still Me hands firmly on the wheel of My own ship. I do Skype sessions with the camera on, after all.)

Today I made a post there and am sharing it in its entirety here to authenticate that these are in fact My words. I feel this verification is necessary because at least one responder on this forum has pretended to be Me, issuing opinions and threats that I do not support or appreciate. I have never authorized anyone to post and sign off as Me, EVER. I do not have a staff, I run this show on My own and with the full support of My husband (who, respectfully does not process My correspondence either).

The post I made today is only the second I have ever made there. The previous post I made was to share a link to one of My later pay sessions that people were having difficulty downloading from a faulty torrent link. I had hoped that My participation in a conversation about content distribution would make it transparent that I have a complex and nuanced attitude regarding unauthorized content distribution. Let Me clarify here that any of My content acquired via creative commons distribution will be honored as such. I maintain a legal right to appropriate attribution of My content, whether distributed in its original form or as part of a derivative work. I welcome fans to remix, sample or in other ways incorporate My work into their own creations. Some of you who were there when I first stepped onto this scene may remember when I shared a link to a particular trance song a DJ friend produced which featured samples of My work and voice. I would love to see more! As a point of policy, I don't issue DMCAs or authorize others to do so on My behalf.

This is where I agree to disagree with almost every one of My respected peers. My philosophy recognizes that people who "pirate" a given content are participating in growing a brand in an unconventional way and that I benefit from their actions even if not monetarily.

Yes, My work is now for sale on KinkBomb. I was approached by a FemDom idol of Mine who invited Me to join and I did. I was encouraged to upload content regularly in order to reach a new audience. Not every person who wanted to own My entire Syllabus was interested in tracking old work down via torrents or Soundcloud. KinkBomb has allowed Me to greatly simplify content distribution and management in a way that frees up a lot of time to create new content, interact with fans and support the community as a whole. 

Can I just say how incredible it feels to by a primarily audio mp3 producer thriving on a platform mostly oriented around video?!?! This is not just My doing, this is My fanbase. They support Me, they enjoy My success, they promote Me and they mean the world to Me. 

Bottom line, I enjoy producing content for adults, and I feel good about My works being hosted on a site that takes care to ensure that content consumers are adults. Oh, and getting paid is nice, too, but a straight-forward payment system that I don't have to micromanage Myself is AWESOME. People just do not know how much work I had to personally put into the back end when I began creating content for pay. One site I had tried to use for fans requesting custom sessions ended up creating more problems than it solved, including but not limited to: delay in upload, failed transfers to content purchasers, time and file size limits, delay in payment and content restrictions. I am in Canada, not the US, where the majority of My fans live, and there are limited options.

Let's be frank. The financial sector is not a friend to people who produce work like Mine. I am delighted to have found a platform where I feel neither My fans nor Myself are being punished or exploited.

As culture and technology continue to evolve, I will always be looking for a way of getting My work into the hands of fans as smoothly as possible in a way that lets Me focus on doing what I love. Guess what I am going to do right after I hit the publish button on this blog post... Record a new session.

Cheers. 

Love, 

Ellechemy


"Hello all,
Ellechemy here, for real, with a few words about some of this controversy. Some... not all.
I know that some of My files that were once free have been moved "behind a paywall" and it has caused much debate. I used to torrent My own work, so it does not bother Me at all that these files and even new ones are available to you. Enough listeners do pay Me for My creations and it finances the making of more sessions.
I never threatened to sue anyone. Ever. Litigation is anethema to My creative process. Anyone claiming to be Me and threatening to sue is likely a well-intended fan or fellow content provider who does not understand My philosophy regarding content distribution.
While I no longer directly provide My content free of charge, I have not and never will persue legal action for unauthorized distribution so long as the content is appropriately tributed.
I will mention that I have encountered My content for sale by unauthorized third parties. In these cases, I have contacted the seller and platform provider and requested it be removed.
I stridently object to a content creator's work being stolen in this manner. However, free peer-to-peer distribution does not concern Me.
Should there be any ambiguity on My stance regarding "piracy", I would refer curious parties to My blog, where I have commented on this subject in the past. Again, I can assure you that I have not EVER written or authorized a threat of legal action for unauthorized peer-to-peer distribution of My work, and as I administrate My own domains, any claim to the contrary is either erroneous or fraudulent.
Thank you for your continued interest in My work.

~ Ellechemy"


I responded to someone's specific questions regarding DMCA's in a second post in this forum and am re-posting it here and in full (with spelling errors corrected) to authenticate that it is in fact My words.


"Neither I nor any party representing Me has issued a DMCA ever. The first I heard of any of this was when someone alerted Me to the fact that someone in this thread was impersonating Me and issuing threats in My name.
I had nothing to do with the closure of the giga account. 
Further, I would invite anyone claiming that they have received legal notice from Me to CAREFULLY check the email headers as I have not engaged in such action.
At this time I cannot imagine a scenario where I would issue a DMCA notice, barring third party, for-profit sales of My work (ie: someone not Me selling My files without My permission). I imagine we can all agree that is reasonable: someone else selling My work, pretending to be Me is a situation where a C&D would be appropriate. The individual fan sharing My work with other fans, with no money changing hands, is a situation I don't feel requires My intervention. 
I think this pretty well covers it, and I hope this issue can finally, if not belatedly, be put to bed. 
I would remind you all that I do not check in here except maybe once or twice a year and that this is not the place to write to Me. Please regard any poster that claims to be Me with suspicion unless their comments are mirrored on a platform I control such as My blog or website, such as above.

Ellechemy"

Days in May

Hello slaves and subbies. May is an exciting month for Me, it's My Birthday Month and you all really enjoy spoiling Me for weeks before and after. I wake up to many beautiful gifts every day. I receive lots of extra inspiration to write, record, film, photograph and of course make time for one-on-one time with My favorite toys.

May is also an exciting month for My studio. The "House of Elle" has been bustling! Additionally, I have been so pleased to watch My *smexy* new sessions receive so many likes. It always feels good to be at the top of My game, but My time so far on KinkBomb has been especially rewarding. Thanks to My many loyal (and new) fans, I have stayed in the Top Lists and have enjoyed certain rewards from running a successful top tier studio. 

Some of you have even bought the same session twice, thanking Me again for what I have created and shared with you. I know listening feels SO good and you've been VERY devoted, so I wanted to reward you by doing something special. And fun.

After some deliberation, I have decided to release PREVIOUSLY UNRELEASED CUSTOM CONTENT all of May. It will be exciting for My listeners to hear some special files which My fans have previously commissioned. These sessions are all re-edited and do not contain the subject's name. Be warned: Some of these sessions are weirder than others. 

Custom sessions can be tricky to release. I have had a lot of fun doing custom video, photo sets and audio sessions. Custom files can end up being so specific and strange, that making them available for general sale could risk alienating one's existing audience.

Customs can also be cohesive, effective & original sessions that fit seamlessly into a collection of ones best work. They can have a wider appeal than expected. I am expecting that from making some of Mine available it will bring a unique voyeuristic excitement to the listener and perhaps get them thinking about custom commissioning their next session or photo set.

So watch for selected previously unreleased files as they become available on KINKBOMB and ELLECHEMISTRY.COM

+<3 Ellechemy

Intent to Serve

Nearly every day I receive an email or message from a slave who wants to serve or be trained. These are two very different things, though not mutually exclusive. Since a slave that is not at least partially trained is wholly unfit to serve, I will graciously cover the basics of training.

Most of those who send Me an impulsive message are not even ready to begin training. I look at these introductions and think, they need PREP.

So, in many ways this blog will seem very beginner or basic, but as My Prime Minister of Canada Justin Trudeau has been saying about the need for men as well as women to support Feminism, "Come on, it's 2016".

We will go over this because clearly there is a need for a refesher. In preparation to submit to the slave training process one must be capable of the following 3 acts, or steps. To achieve success or to reach a level of excellence, one must be passionate about these acts.

Step 1 : Consistent Humility

Every day you must do something to sacrelize (make sacred) your true slave transformation & reinforce your place. If you want to serve or be owned in any permanent way, this is going to be the first commitment you make.

Examples: Kiss the floor, write "slave" (on your self/or lines), wear a collar for 1 hour, train with an audio session (femdom). Anything that gets you into the head space of being of service. Look for opportunities to be of service to others throughout the day: (hold the door for someone, yielding to someone else in traffic, giving up your seat to someone in transit, etc.)

The point is not necessarily to carve out time for these acts, but to begin to incorporate them smoothly into your daily waking life, and always getting better at them.

(There will always be someone whose response to this is that they already do this, and that is the person who usually most needs a smack on the ass or a jerk on the collar to get them over themselves.)

There are people who dedicate every minute of every day of their lives perfecting humility to a level comparable to a master violinist.

A slave must be ready & willing to be of service. If you're doing it right every improvement only reveals how much more you have to learn. If you haven't yet become the subject of an internet sensation video featuring you restoring faith in humanity, then don't tell Me you do this already.

None of these acts should involve sexual gratification at the time, even though they may become sexualized in the slave's mind. None of these acts should involve "sucking up" as that is clearly an act of ambition, not one of humility. Only consistency will show over time, the sub's actual intent.

*Note: How a slave shows consistency will differ from how a Domme shows consistency. Always remember that Dommes are rare creatures while slaves exist in abundance. Many Dommes enjoy keeping numerous slaves, so do not be discouraged, but do be mindful that your Domme might not have the same amount of time that you do for a certain activity. For example, I am not always able to answer every message a slave sends, especially if the slave ends up sending 20 in one day. I will read every one, and ban them from sending more if it is interfering with My other tasks. I see these messages for the emotional and devotional outpourings that they are and answer the exuberant slave at the end of the day.

A slave should be able to give feedback WITHOUT any expectation as to what its Owner may or may not do with this information. There is a fine line between communication with a Domme and "free phone sex" so be prepared to write this down and submit it to Her with a tribute that acknowledges Her time in reading and responding.

*Consider: Meditate on the difference between genuine humility and humility as a bargaining tool (ambition).


Step 2 : The Will to Serve

Will you do as you are told? Even if it does not appear to provide instant gratification, a slave obeys. At all times, a slave does as it is told for its beloved, trusted Owner. Can you make a promise & keep it? Will you work hard to be a worthy slave? Are you able to tribute or otherwise give financial support? Could you devote a certain amount of time to being of service? Would you publicly (if anonymously) worship your Domme?

Be careful not to "be willing" to do things that do more for you than for Her.

Do not become the promo-slave with minimal followers and expect an established Domme to see that as anything but self-serving.

Be aware, you will assume some risk up front in the form of a paid deposit for Her time. The sooner you understand that She is being approached full-time by subs whose intentions are for a quick thrill or to drag out negotiations for a service they have NO intention of paying for (known as time-wasters), the sooner you will be on the right side of Her screening process.

Every day I get messages from slaves saying "Mistress! Help Me! I need discipline!" I completely agree but not in the way they're thinking (and that thinking is evidence that this is true). Don't be the slave who calls out for "discipline" as true discipline is something that cannot simply be given.

Discipline and punishment are NOT the same thing. The D in BDSM is not true discipline, but retaliatory punishment. The discipline of the Domme is Self-Mastery, a commitment to exerting one's will over one's actions more than actions exert power over one's will.

The discipline of the slave is the commitment to serve the Domme even when it does not serve the slave.

A Domme will show a slave the way to self-discipline & the slave will follow. A slave will not disobey for attention. A slave will think of ways to do better than what is expected of it - it will exceed those expectations through creativity, ingenuity or sheer perversity. A Domme's love & discipline will make the slave see even more potential & possibilities than it could ever imagine or realize on its own.


*Note: Willingness is what separates the true subjects from the so-called "fuck-boys" of the internet/world. If every task involves the sub's sexual gratification or puts demands on the Dommes time, then the Domme will never take the sub seriously and the sub will never progress beyond a pay-for-play relationship. In the sub's eagerness to serve, they may intentionally or mistakenly skip over the training. That is like only doing the stretches on your workout regime: it may feel good, but you missed the real point of the exercise.

*Consider: Perform all of your most difficult or least appealing tasks first. Meditate on gratitude and how you express it.

Step 3 : Trust & Truth

A slave will ALWAYS do its best for someone who it trusts. It is imperative that the slave knows itself well enough to recognize when a Domme understands it. An established Domme will have more of everything to offer Her slave-in-training. An experienced Domme will be able to negotiate the intense emotional landscape of D/s safely. And if the two of you are not a good fit at this time, a successful Domme will be able to do the right thing and let the slave go without being dependent upon the slave for any reason.

A new Domme does not yet have the full power to truly handle an emotional new slave who is hurtling through subspace, unable to voice its needs. It is My opinion and experience that the the best clients for new Dommes are experienced slaves, shared slaves and the casual noob role-playing submissive. When I was a new Domme, I had an "old" slave who I learned so much from it could fill several blogs. This is a natural order of stable growth for a scene that is mostly and best self-regulated by its members.

A sub with an inexperienced Domme can go through years of pain and suffering that is not the sexy kind. I receive so many letters from subs who have become depressed by the process and it is not easy to move out of that. They have My deepest sympathies. A submissive with the right Domme can actually become trained to serve so well that they eventually end up in a happy long term D/s relationship with an Alpha or a Domme that is right for them. I have done this with distance slaves and am still in contact with them. I have helped numerous submissives build the skills and self-knowledge needed to succeed in real-life loving relationships with their Dominant life partner. Seeing them owned, serving and loved makes Me incredibly proud and happy for everyone involved. It was an honor to release them from service to Me and into the hands and cages of their capable Owners.

None of this was achieved without mutual awareness and trust. The kind that goes both ways. There is no trust where was no risk. Trust comes in time. The responsible thing to do is to give this time, because time is the other ingredient of trust.

I know for an inexperienced sub that words like trust and responsibility don't seem very sexy. Now, trust Me, the reality of a trusting mutually responsible and respectful D/s relationship far exceeds the wildest weirdest darkest fantasy your pervy little mind can concoct.

*Note: No serious sub can expect to pick a Domme by 1 quality alone. Whether judging a Domme by looks, number of followers, Her name, Her specialty, Her location, Her equipment, etc the slave who is serious will do their research. Read reviews, talk to someone who is in service to Her and expect to tribute in some way during a getting-to-know-each-other period. I recommend setting up some kind of paid phone consultation or first intro session which can cover lots of ground. Be sure to communicate to the Domme that this is your intent as these introductory sessions are most useful when everyone is prepared.

~ Mistress Ellechemy

+<3

New Directions

It may have come to your attention that I have restructured access to My sessions. 

Why are they gone?

They aren't gone, they are moving from Soundcloud to KinkBomb. 
Because My files range from ADULT ONLY to XXX-plicit content, hosting them on an ADULT site gives Me more control over who has access to My work. This is very important to Me as I am well aware of how powerfully My work can affect even the most resistant subject and I have a constant stream of messages in My inbox to prove it. 


When will my favorite session be available?

Very soon. Sessions are being released often. Fans who check in daily will not be disappointed. Whether it's a new release, short video or tweet, there's always more Ellechemistry to absorb.


They have new cover art!

Yes, there is a definite theme to the new cover art. There is an intentional return to form. This fetish has it's own history and mythology. It's difficult to pinpoint where our interests or obsessions began, but for many of us with a hypno-fetish it may be a particular pulp novel, piece of erotic literature or even comic book or cartoon. I wanted to pay homage to the some of the source material that inspires Me.

What can fans expect in 2016?

Expect to see new and exciting subsections of the Syllabus as it grows. One of the reasons I am excited about having increased control over who can see My work is because it frees Me up to explore more extreme themes and subject matter. I have always been very careful about what I release knowing that it often takes more profound hold than I would have imagined. 

I look forward to giving My fans an opportunity to support the creation of new materials and building My visibility with a new audience. This will come in many forms, including social media engagement, polls, contests, collaborations and many other exciting ways to demonstrate your devotion to Ellechemy.


More extreme themes?

Yes! Many of you have noticed that the theme of TRANSFORMATION runs throughout all of My work. It does deeply, yet there is another part to that theme I wish to explore, and that is the PROCESS. I have spent a long time and much effort getting to this very moment. Not satisfied with taking on transformation in and of itself, but how it occurs, and why, explored explicitly, in new media and different kinds of sessions, by following up on frequently requested subject matter, and the continuations of fan favorites.

Without getting into the HOW and the WHY of transformation (or any topic) there is only so far you can go without repeating yourself. Without the further, philosophical questions being asked here we would inevitably be saying the same things over and over without making any progress past the introductions. 

That is certainly no way to push limits or boundaries or widen one's horizons in any significant way. Growth always results in some change, and some of us naturally resist that. The only stasis I enjoy is the kind I inflict. 


There are themes and ideas I have been developing for a long time. I feel I now have a stable of subjects sufficiently trained to handle more advanced experiences and assignments. I am very excited to (un)leash the most diabolical products of My imagination in the year ahead. Happy 2016. 

Hypnotically yours,

Ellechemy

Letters from the Edge

I get messages of this flavor often: people turning to me to resolve quandries composed of personal experience, compelling moments in the past, and some measure of magical thinking regarding My involvement in their lives. 
Once in a while I answer the questions they want answered... but do you really know what you wanted in the first place?

Hi Mistress Elle,

I hope you don't mind this email. I have a question for you. I've been listening to your recordings on and off for a couple of months. Some of them I've connected with, some of them I have not. Upon re-listening to the first two on your syllabus I had an incredibly strange, and thought provoking reaction. I was wondering if you would be willing, if possible, to shed some light on it.

Before I can explain what happened after the session, I have to give you a little backstory. When I was 17 years old I went through, for lack of a better way to describe it,  a period of extreme happiness. This "happiness" was linked to what was happening in my life at the time. The people in it, the events surrounding me, and the future that was right around the corner. The feeling I had is extremely hard to describe. It was almost like a vibration that ran through my body - a happiness vibe. A year later, when things weren't going so well, I was able to turn my inner life around by focusing on those times and that feeling, getting it back, although somewhat muted. It's come and gone over the years and morphed into a different sensation.

A couple of years ago I was meditating to an Attracting Wealth program and some of that original feeling emerged. It didn't stay for long. I didn't really focus too much on it. I would like to note here that the session I listened to had a subliminal track underneath the meditation music.

Last week I listened to "Easy" followed by "Even More Obedient". When I had finished the feeling felt like it was beaming out of me. It was almost completely overwhelming. It was the same feeling that I had as a kid with one exception - it felt synthetic. The feeling was there, but it wasn't latched onto, well, me. It's like  it wasn't personal. It was strong but felt fake. Looking back at the experience with the meditation program, it was the same thing except this time the feeling was about 1000 times stronger. It was also accompanied by a splitting headache.

My first question to you is, have ever heard of anything like this? I know that  ASMR is experienced by a lot of people. Is this that? What would cause this?

Any insights you may have on this subject would be extremely helpful. *

Thank you for your time,
XXXXX


* - ANY insights? Okay!

Hiya XXXXX!

It sounds to Me like you are wrestling with the intrinsically transitory nature of serendipity, or what some would call "real rapture". Part of the nature of our encounters with desire is the context in which we discover it. That context consists of countless variables that cannot converge in exactly the same way again, not the least of which is the newness of the sensation. No matter how we may seek to recreate a moment in which we felt the worldview-toppling tug of desire, the one element we absolutely cannot recreate is a version of ourselves that had not experienced it, and did not anticipate the experience of it.

C.S. Lewis touched on this in the opening arguments of "Pilgrim's Regress", and develops it as the central thematic arc throughout. His protagonist is entirely defined by his wrestling with this problem. Lewis later elaborates on the relationships between desire, pleasure, newness, and spontanaity in "Perelandra" in an overarcing argument regarding the nature of evil (in which he puts forward that it is not desire, but our wish to control and recreate encounters with desire, that fuels much of human evil). 

An interesting praxis for this theme can be synthesized by juxtaposing the impossibility of a self that knows what it lacks that is beyond its bounds (ala Kierkegaard) and the self that can only be whole in its ruthless pursuit of earnest self-definition (ala Sartre). I believe the resolution of this problem is a recognition and acceptance that while it is to us to choose as an act of self-definition, and that choice consistent with the epistemic implications of our merkwelt acts as a reliable moral and existential compass, it is the unknowability and unpredictability of genuine encounters with desire that connects that self to a space with which it can meaningfully interact. Even as it is an ever-changing and unknown "us" that we principally interact with, the moments that seem to transcend those bounds inform us of a context in which that "us" exists and thus we know ourselves to be not of our own making. Thus we are honest, if never whole.

Cheers,
~Elle

Transparency

If you are hopelessly captivated by Me then I have a secret to share with you. In the 24 years I have been doing part-time gray area sex work, I have made many discoveries along the way. Yes, since 1989 I have have engaged in everything from phone sex to pro Domination, I have had My own dungeon and I have started gothic themed fetish events in Vancouver and Toronto that are still running strong today. I have pioneered new models of business, content distribution and ways to interact and engage My fans. I have incarnated under more than a couple names and aliases. No matter what I have done or will do, it is always on My terms. My other pursuits and career demands occasionally temporarily take Me away from these exploits, but I always return because the truth is that My interactions with submissive minds ignites My dominance and I like it.  

Six years ago in 2009 I emerged as Ellechemy, the HypnoDomme. I was delighted to discover the community for FemDom Hypnosis (FD Hypno) at Inraptured after being introduced and invited there by a local submissive I was playing with at the time and had met on FetLife. I was told to be careful because there were a lot of social rules, many of which were unspoken, and I was implored to be extremely respectful of the other more established HypnoDommes and their property. I was the new girl, and this was before the term Insta Domme had hit. I would not have been considered an Insta Domme there had anyone know My background, but the other thing that was stressed to Me was that this community reverently relished their anonymity and their fantasies. So, I entered and interacted with many submissives and a few Dommes, many of which I am close with to this day. 

One more thing that was made crystal clear to Me as I rose through the ranks of the FD Hypno world, was that Financial Domination, though permitted in the community, was not enjoyed by many and a hard limit for some altogether. I have always been vocal in My stance that I am able to be a 24/7 natural born lifestyle Domme, and that I am a Pro Domme as well. It depends on what is going on in My life at the time and who you are which aspects of My personality will be brought out to the surface. It is always at My discretion what kind of possibilities exist for a relationship. 

I now have a healthy following and fan base for someone who operates as an independent in this world of online and in-person gray area sex work. It was My choice early on not to use sites that took a large percentage of My fee for My content and/or expected Me to share any personal or financial information. On principle, I vowed never to put Myself in the position where the customer had more protection, anonymity or rights than Me. Slowly but surely it has worked well for Me. Because I have never worked off of an adult website, cam or clip site, there has never been a third party to resolve any potential conflict, I have always taken a hands on approach with each individual who has purchased or commissioned something from Me. I have been personally responsible for every success and would be for every failure, though there have been few of those. Perhaps because I had to take care of anything less than superb Myself, when it did arise, I learned the lessons fast. Perhaps My Alpha attitude kept Me out of trouble and resolved issues before they ever became conflicts. My real life career has prepared Me well for any thing that could happen online, as has My many years of experience and involvement in the BDSM and kink scenes all across My country, and vice versa. 

It never ceases to amaze Me how respectful My fans and admirers are and have been about My boundaries. I know it goes both ways, and that is why it has taken all of this to get to the secret I have to share with some of you today. I have never once ever referred to Myself as a FinDom, even when I monetized My skill set and accepted tributes "just because"... but I have just secretly made and launched a new website exclusively for Luxury Financial Domination and this is a bigger surprise to Me than it may be to most of you. As I have with FD Hypno, I created a unique feel and personal spin on the fetish of financial domination, taking more control of you through currency. 

I would never consider killing a sub who came to Me for a session of pain infliction no matter how high the tolerance, and therefore I would never consider blackmail or bankruptcy as an option for a fin-sub, but people do not know this and ask questions out of fear and ignorance. As in all things sexy, I like to leave My subjects better than I found them. I am an optimist with a very real track record of kinky life-coaching and the references to back these claims up. I may just say yes to your gifts and graciously accept your tributes on My terms, all of which makes you more and more obsessed with what comes next... and I may liberate you from your worst fears as you face your secret desires and disgusts through high risk sexual activities with a calculating Female mind taking care of you the entire time, up to and including the after care you need to prevent a post-session freak out. I have a ridiculous amount of compassion underneath all this wonderful perversion and subversion and you know it if you're still reading this far. 

My generous nature extends now into a fetish which is so potent at a time when the scene has been very nearly over-saturated with lazy, greedy and desperate men and women flagellating themselves and their potential partners with overused catchphrases with so much stealth misogyny and the bar just seems lower than ever. This is NOT why I have launched a luxury financial domination website after years of building a loyal hypno fetish fan base. I have done so because I was invited into an exclusive world of Financial Domination, and I was reminded of being invited into the FemDom Hypno Fetish world. I thought about what I would have done differently, should an opportunity such as this arise ever again. I wanted to create a presence, a brand and to reveal My credentials more honestly and transparently in a corner of the fetish world where the risks and rewards are both very, very high. So, in conclusion, if you are not interested in following or participating in this fetish with Me, because that is a limit for you, that is okay. But if you think or even consider saying that Ellechemy is a FinDom now or has been all along, you have missed the point entirely. These two sites with their corresponding social media presence and affiliated accounts will not see much, if any, overlap. It will never be a requirement that an Ellechemy fan engage in any activity other than erotic FemDom hypnosis and neither should it be a concern or a fear that it is My agenda. For some of you, it may be, simply, an opportunity or an option.

I would like to sincerely thank you for your continued support in 

My creative endeavors, always, and I give you

A Ring of Truth

I have been thinking, as I often do, in symbolic terms about the day to day lives of My chastity slaves. There are many devotees of Ellechemy who have entered or who wish to enter into a vow of chastity for Me.

Chastity can be short term or long term. It can be playful or it can be punishment. It can involve a cage or belt that truly locks, even with piercings for added security... and it can even be enforced via hypnotic mind control.

The reasons, the benefits and the ways to make such a vow are as varied as the backgrounds and desires of the individual. Ultimately the decision is made and an agreement between Key Holder and slave is reached. A promise is made.

Here we come to the part of being a Key Holder that really interests and excites Me. The promise. I am a visual person. I embrace symbols and sigils for their power to remind the conscious mind and to transform the unconscious or the psyche of a subject, Myself included. When a promise is made, a visual or tangible object intended to remind and reinforce one's commitment becomes a very precious thing. A chastity cage or belt is far too functional to be purely symbolic. The key to the lock is both functional and symbolic, however... the chaste slave is not the one who holds the key. The chaste slave often deeply desires such a prominent emblem. A badge of honor, if you will.

From now on, those subjects who desire to experience any sort of chastity promise or play with Me will be required to have a PURITY ring that fits on the ring finger of either their left or right hand. Once the terms of abstinence are agreed to and the period begins, the subject will wear their PURITY ring for the duration. Unlike the caged, belted, locked or otherwise controlled portion of property, this PURITY ring can be displayed at all times without debilitating social consequences. There will be debilitation, that I promise you, but it can remain our little secret.

After you have obtained a suitable ring, which may or may not have words on it, you will wear the ring ONLY while in chastity. If you take off the ring for any reason, that is fine, however you may feel a strong desire not to. As a proudly owned slave, you will naturally always want to wear it.

Now this brings Me to the rule which is above all the most important to Me. That is, that you may not wear the ring while pleasuring yourself. No exceptions. If you are given permission to come out of the cage for cleaning, and you are only cleaning and not stimulating yourself for pleasure, the PURITY ring may remain on your finger. If you are wearing a cage or not, and whether or not you have permission to masturbate, you will remove the PURITY ring. Those are My orders and, subsequently, My last word on the subject.

Even if you, as a distance slave, have a slip up, you may be forgiven and even discover redemption because you still observed the rules of the PURITY ring. If you were to ever masturbate, even slightly, while wearing your PURITY ring, then you will know without a doubt that you have transgressed in a way that will reveal with absolute certainty what you are not.

As every subject, submissive or slave of Mine has ever done during the course of service to Me, you will find yourself wondering if you have pleased Me. Well, if you are able to observe this ritual of PURITY surrounding your chastity, then the answer will be Yes. If you are not able to, then simply know for yourself that you have neither pleased Me nor disappointed Me. I simply care not, or rather, I am not in a position to ever take your vow more seriously than you.

My chosen slaves are incredible human beings who bring much joy and satisfaction to My life. They challenge Me to be more than I already am, without challenging My authority for it's own sake. True submissives always have a place at My feet and will always be duly rewarded knowing without a doubt that they have done well.

Ellechemy

+<3

No Shame in My Game

"Ellechemy", i screwed up".

I regularly receive emails along these lines. The language is usually more flowery, sometimes all the way to florid. Some subs seem to love their prose as purple as their spanking marks.
These emails usually fall into one of three patterns:

1) The sub who really screwed up and earnestly wants to apologize. This almost never happens. Most subs who are self-aware enough to be completely honest in an apology are also able to head off a transgression before it occurs. When apology is necessary, and the real point, it is usually straight-forward and light on window-dressing (i.e. absent paragraphs of self-recrimination, pledges of undying devotion, etc). Note that these people NEVER ask to be punished. They apologize, I accept the apology or not, and that's that.

2) The sub who is playing out their part in a previously negotiated punishment scenario. We will have talked about their desires, planned an acceptable range of "mistakes" they can make, discussed the punishments they find most satisfying, and will have arranged a time for this to all play out. I strongly encourage clear communication regarding desires, and that includes the desire to be punished. Starting with clear disclosure makes it possible to create a scenario where those desires are addressed artfully and inventively without unduly intruding on either person.

3) The sub who likes to be punished and has "screwed up" specifically to provoke punishment.

The first situation, when it occurs, is usually resolved in a matter of minutes, with little distress on anyone's part. 
The second is grand fun for all involved.
The third... Well, the third is the primary topic of this post, through which I think we can reveal patterns that merit broader discussion.

"i screwed up. i'm being honest with you!"

A spontaneous "confession" intended to provoke punishment almost always includes several desperate affirmations of honesty: the honesty of the confession, the honesty of the remorse, the honesty of the feelings of devotion thoughtlessly abandoned in a moment of whatever it was.

I'll spare us the obvious diatribe about how often liars insist on their honesty and how rarely the honest do, or flogging the example of the used car salesman making heavy use of the phrase "trust me". I want to avoid those old chestnuts about honesty because I think there actually is a form of honesty on display in these situations.

This hypothetical person, so insistent on the honesty of their mistake and confession, is being honest in more or less the same way that Olivier is honest when he plays Hamlet (Olivier, being timeless, will always be referred to in the present tense. Always). 

There is a character they are playing with some expectation of interacting with other characters, whose responses are all derived from the same script. These characters and interactions, in accordance with the script, create a contained story that unfolds more according to rules of dramatic or thematic necessity than the often drab logic of real-world events. This is the world of suspended disbelief, of the convenient coincidence, and, most pertinent to our discussion here, of the two-dimensional character whose only purpose is to advance the plot. We'll come back to that shortly.

Regarding the honesty of our self-appointed lead character (who is also, conveniently, the writer and, unless they put themselves in check, the frustrated director): there is a very limited sort of honesty possible when there are scripts and characters involved, and that sort of honesty is at cross-purposes to the vulnerability necessary for an earnest apology. When the apology itself is part of the script, the question of honesty goes right out the window. We can no longer ask if the apology is honest or not, only whether or not the performance is convincing. 

Here it may be tempting to think that the Domme is the intended audience for this performance. This is not the case. The sub, in addition to their roles as lead, writer, and director, is also the intended audience. These are dramas played by them for their own satisfaction, and will likely enjoy a long run of repeat performances.

What, then, is the Domme, if they are not the lead, not the writer, rarely the director, and not the audience? Well, gentle readers, that brings me back to my earlier mention of two-dimensional characters who advance the plot, which is what the Domme is much of the time. They have no interests apart from those that serve the drama, their desires are devices by which situations are created that satisfy the desire of the imaginer, and nothing about their actions within the scene indicate they have any existence prior to or after the scene. At best, the Domme is a supporting character. At worst, they are a prop.

A particular Domme is, for all intents and purposes, an actor playing a role defined by the script. They do not define this role. A skilled Domme infers the lines they are intended to deliver. They infer their actions, their queues, their entrances, and their exits. Their role is written for them, and not by them.

To dispel any doubt on the truth of this, I must speak directly to an underdiscussed truth: that the role of the Domme in these fantasies are prone to frequent recasting. A given sub may fantasize about, or have sessions with, a few Dommes, or a few dozen Dommes, each playing essentially the same role without the fantasy changing in any substantial way. 

This is the nature of personal fantasies: they are principally concerned with the person doing the fantasizing, with other people acting as props, prompts, or proxies. This applies to fantasies of all sorts, sexual or otherwise: the characters that are not ourselves admire, admonish, or adore us in service to our needs, with no real needs of their own. It's a small slice of fiction entirely concerned with us, and that's fine. Some of our fantasies serve to motivate us, others as symbols of catharsis, still others as a refuge of relief from some aspect of our day to day interactions we'd enjoy setting aside for a time.

In the context of kink, the fantasy aspect of these scenarios is acknowledged via the boundaries and rules of engagement involved. Mistress Matisse, a regular contributor to the Savage Love podcast, refers to kink as "Masters Degree sexuality", referring to the careful process of clear explanation, negotiation, and communication involved in navigating a sexual fantasy scenario. Most kink communities have a very robust collective understanding of these communication dynamics and offer exhaustive resources for helping newcomers "learn the ropes" (yes. Yes, I did).

The boundaries that a Domme and a sub negotiate and agree upon serve many purposes, such as insuring that the play is safe and satisfying to all involved. In the case of a Pro Domme, this includes appropriate compensation for the Domme setting aside some of their own preferences in order to better fulfill the fantasies of the sub. Whether or not direct compensation is involved, these boundaries also serve to recognize and protect the personhood of both the Domme and the sub. It is a mutual acknowledgement that the fantasy has defined bounds, within which the normal rules of mutual respect can be safely suspended as agreed upon. 

When those boundaries are crossed or ignored, the fantasy intrudes on out-of-scene life, and that intrusion is an immediate affront to the personhood of the other person. In the case of the sub crossing the boundaries established by the Domme, the fiction of the fantasy is being applied outside the agreed upon bounds, and we must remember that in that fiction the Domme is not really, truly, recognized as a person. They are being treated as a prop outside the time in which they've said it's okay to do so.

There's a word for that: dehumanizing. It's beyond mere disrespect, and it directly contradicts the tenets of the Domme-sub roles (inside or outside the fiction). The sub who ignores a Domme's boundaries is effectively saying "I worship you unless you don't give me what I want, when I want it", which is a very curious kind of worship.

The sub who ignores those boundaries in order to prompt the punishment scenario they desire is effectively communicating something made clearer by stripping away the overtly false language of "worship": "I disrespected you (the transgression) to create a pretext to disrespect you again (the boundary-crossing contact) to reduce you to a prop (the forced beginning of a "scene" style interaction) so you can gratify me (via the punishment)."

"i'm sorry, it wasn't my intention!"

Oh, an accident just happened to give you exactly what you want, without playing by the rules, at no cost to yourself, but substantial cost to someone else?

There's a word for that kind of "accident". The word is theft, but here there's more than commerce at play.

As we've already discussed, the cycle of transgression-admission-punishment is the main payoff for some people. That one-two-three is the money shot moment that their sexual fantasies build around. That's fine. Like most every psycho-sexual scenario, it can be integrated into a healthy process of negotiation and clear, honest communication. This one, however, is especially tricky.

Imagine we have two subs on their way to a session with their favorite Domme. sub one has a kink for breath play. sub two enjoys the transgression-punishment cycle.
Both subs arrive late and realize they'd left their payment at home. The Dommes send them home with a harsh word and a wink and a reminder to be on-time and ready next time they book a session.
sub one goes home disappointed.
sub two got exactly what they wanted.

I don't believe there's a solid link between certain sexual interests and other aspects of personal character, i.e. I don't believe that people into one flavor of kink are more honest or caring or intelligent than people into any other flavor of kink. A fascination with transgressions and punishments, however, poses some unique challenges for the sub. It can be very easy to fall into a cycle in which one swings between "good behavior" (negotiates for scenarios, honestly discusses interests, respects the rules and boundaries set down by the Domme) and "bad behavior" (violates boundaries, breaks rules/commitments, expects the punishment of their preference, then enjoys a good grovel). This cycle is especially easy to fall into because the sub who enjoys crossing a line, getting caught, and being spanked for it is getting what they want throughout that swing of the pendulum. It is dangerously easy to fall into a perspective where the "good behavior" scenario (in which the Domme is respected) is interchangeable with the "bad behavior" scenario (where the Domme is being treated contemptuously, even if not outright robbed).

Every kink has some sort of pitfall or potential set of toxic habits that must be recognized and avoided. The same can be said of golf, poker, or sexuality in general. This is part of why being honest is so important, both with yourself and any Dommes or playmates. If you aren't honest about what you want you don't understand how it can run off the rails in a way that leaves you frustrated and abandoned by Domme or play partner. In this particular situation, lack of self-honesty also opens the possibility of increasingly large, and unexamined, reserves of shame. Not the fun, flushed-cheeks, wink-wink sexy shame, but the honest-to-goodness, eating your life from the inside-out until there's nothing left but the lies kind of shame.

That last part may sound a bit dramatic, exaggerated, or crazy sexy hot (and seriously, I am always up for negotiating a hot "existential dread" session. Mmmmmmmm....Camus).

FAIR WARNING: 

WE GET A BIT RAW FROM HERE ON OUT

Ellechemistry Turns One

Ellechemistry.com celebrates 1 year with a beautifully and purposefully designed new version of the site. Some changes you may notice include the picture Gallery page becoming a Video Gallery and boutique. My intention is to create an evolving and interactive experience for visitors.

Instead of having a separate forum for discussion the focus is on a more intimate exploration of hypnosis. New embedded playlists can be streamed and sessions themselves are now comment and download enabled. Listeners can like or leave comments with time codes at specific points of any of their favourite parts of any of My sessions.

The menu bar is the fastest way to wherever you need to get to on the site and redundant pages are gone. After spending a full year closely observing site traffic patterns, I have assembled all of My highest quality content to flow smoothly into the consciousness of the viewer.

Some aesthetic changes that I am especially pleased with include the new colour palette, background images and how My blog looks when viewed from the Blog page. The Twitter app allows for subjects to live tweet Me with their comments, questions or as they listen to playlists and become more and more suggestible.

If you've been looking around you may have noticed that I have had some fun with easter eggs. I am inspired and it is My intention to post new content every Friday for the next several weeks. Based on response that could become permanent.

Those who have followed Me from the beginning know that I didn't rush to launch a site. I spent years building My library and wanted My website to be just right or not at all. Ellechemistry.com is My home and you will see more and more of Me here as I work to create another level and layer of depth and meaning to this pastime we all enjoy so much.

Ellechemy

+<3

Simpatico

I want you to think of Simpatico as an essential album of top level sessions designed to create a state of like-mindedness between subject and hypnotist. The psychological virtues of using hypnosis and the rewards of doing so are explored in depth beginning with the hypnotic trust exercise session 'Doubtless'. 

Simpatico asks not for the subject to trust Me, the hypnotist, but to trust one's self and to invite the subconscious to integrate new levels of self awareness. Simpatico asks the listener not to search outside of self for what is missing, but instead teaches  how to process and integrate that which has already been taken in.

Whether the goal is to build the confidence required to take a big step or simply to begin to seriously contemplate even a small one, Simpatico takes the subject back to the beginning for a fresh start. I am often asked by those who have trained with My syllabus what the ultimate goal for Me and My subject is at the end of this course ware. Inducing an enduring mental state of open awareness that empowers a subject to safely explore their desires and even bring them to life has always been My motivation. 

For those who desire a new or improved real life D/s relationship, this series will get the subject ready and confident to take the next step in their own personal journey. This series will become a prerequisite for subjects who wish to session with Me in real time serving to build rapport and trust between hypnotist and subject. 

A self assured subject is going to know how to be able to feel safe in any given situation. Even if you know My boundaries exceed yours, you understand that I will not exceed yours unless asked. I want you to feel like you can approach Me in order to get to know Me better, and to learn what I want from you, in any given situation, and that you are wise to do so. 

If you have already trained intensively with My Syllabus then you have already been instilled with more than just triggers, post hypnotic suggestions and other behavioral modifications. I have imparted upon you new values and a renewed sense of purpose and place, reminding you that the subconscious is the realm of dreams and aspirations.

 Ellechemy 

+<3